so this is life aye

I think i'll stick to blogger.com this year after trying like copious amounts of blogs, ie; xanga, livejournal, twitter...

Oh wow, what to write. I've been so caught up lately everythings moving way to fast for me. But i guess it's a new year, so new starts here i come. I must admit though not everythings started as smooth for me as i wish it would.

I feel like each of these need to be a seperate blog but here goes nothing;

1.
I got into the "International Business - Advanced Diploma course @ RMIT". Although i wanted to get into "Advertising", i don't mind though in the end i will hopefully see myself in the Bachelor of International Business. 15 HD's later though. Get pumped and focus LISA LAY!
I'm a little freaked by all this though, i'm not 18 anymore. I'm 19. I need to focus and do well. I don't want to fall back, because what if the next thing i know i'm 26, jobless with nothing under my belt. I feel like this is a 2nd chance for me, considering last year wasn't what i wanted it to be.

2.
So get this, D realises that his relationship is pretty much fucked with his gf and decides to come back crawling to me and even though i asked him whether or not he'd be out with me if he was still with his gf, i knew deep inside that he wouldn't have. It always happens, he always comes back to me when his alone. The thing is this time, i don't feel obliged to be there for him anymore. We've had something in the past but now its definately dead and gone, well for me anyway.
In saying that i was out on a "day out" with D the other week and after a frustrating day out, i got to go home. I was on the bus home when it occured to me that i miss H, i had this feeling, you know the feeling you get when everything just builds up and pushes the tears out. Thankfully i was sporting my sunglasses. I thought i was doing fine in the moving on department, i obviously thought wrong.

3.
Talking about H. His rent's are going through a tough divorce atm. I talked to him the other day after all that time apart, his not taking it well. Not that you would. I know i can't make everything go away, but i hope he knows i'm here and that i've never really left.

4.
My families not that great either, i finally blew a fuse last week. I've just had enough of my mothers bullshit. All the complaints and unneeded comments. Okay so you cook my food, pay the bills and own the house. Unfortunately for you, thats no excuse for the poor excuse YOU are for a mother. You don't even know me, and you never will. Sometimes i wish dad was here.