Here is where i'm suppose rant and rave about amazing Future Music was and whilst it was amazing, the events that occured afterwards weren't as much. I don't think i've ever hated drugs in my life as much as i did that day.
I should be angry at you, not vice versa. I should be the cold one considering i'm the one that spent my time looking for you.. just because i wanted to know you were safe. What do i get though? Nothing. This is where i go, i hate you, you ignorant dickhead. But i don't.
Those that know me well know that i hate feeling weak. The feeling of not being able to control the way i feel about something/someone, is something i'm afraid to endure. It's hard for me to comprehend being hopeless at anytime in my life considering the event's that have unfolded during the 20 years i've lived. Standing strong, holding on to those important and letting go to those that aren't is always a hard lesson to learn. So in saying that i want to assume that you mean nothing more to me, then an entity that can be easily cast away with the flick of my fingers, but your not.. and i don't want you to be. You care about me and do for me, more then most people in my life have ever done and cared. And even though i don't show it, i appreciate it.
I don't know whether or not my emotions are caused by shopping withdrawals (it's been nearly a week) or just PMS. I'm guessing it's the later. Haha!!
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